So, one of the most wonderful things I have come across in his Moroccan (Islamic) culture is the woman keeping her surname when she gets married.
The first time I came across this realization that Moroccan woman keep their family name, I was baffled. I really didn’t know what to think. So, I began looking for an explanation on why American women so easily give away their name and take on the husband’s surname when they get married.
There just really isn’t a time in history that I could find that began the rights of women to choose to take a husband’s name or to keep their family name. It is kind of a mystery. I tried searching the internet for laws, decrees, or just declarations of laws or rules to mandate what a woman should do with their surname when getting married. But nothing really came up as “this is when it all happened”.
So, after doing a lot of research, I decided when I got married to my Moroccan husband, that I was going to keep my last name. The name my father gave to me. It isn’t so much for the inheritance or laws governing them, because I really did not have an inheritance when my father passed away.
It was because Moroccan (or Islamic) culture has it right. A woman’s right are with her surname, and so is her inheritance, and heritage. A woman doesn’t become an honorary member of her husband’s family just because she takes his name. She is still who she “was and is”, and it doesn’t give her any rights to his husband’s father inheritance (she is not her husband’s father’s newest child).
The only thing it really does it make it easier for her to fill out paperwork for anything in the US. It might also give a sense of belonging to a certain family. Most American women loved to “belong” to her husband, and feel all warm and cuddly when she now calls herself by her husband’s last name.
It is definitely a personal choice, but I don’t think American woman really have ever thought about keeping their name, they just go with the flow and sign over their names on the marriage certificate.
My point is — just think about it. What difference does it make if you carry your husband’s name. How does it change you? Don’t you want to know why American’s do certain things that the rest of the world wouldn’t even consider.
Just think about it, comment and start the discussion about changing your surnames. And I invite other stories of when you came to the realization that you wanted to keep you surname also.